The Ten Things I've Learnt in India Thus Far

[mc_mike]

10) The Taj Mahal's fucking incredible.

9) Sometimes cobbing's necessary to get your girlfriend a seat on a coach. A good throw in's not so bad an idea either.

8) It takes three full days for your body to acclimate to Indian cuisine.

7) Beaches aren't for swimming. They're for congregating.

6) No matter where you are, never tell any of your girlfriend's family you're undecided in your future. You'll wind up with a long list of arse-numbingly dull suggestions and unwanted expectations to follow through with them.

5) Cows are like tourists. They're sodding everywhere.

4) You don't casually cross a street in India. It's bleeding impossible. You close your eyes, pray to Merlin's goolies that you'll make it across, run for it, and try not to hit a cow.

3) Monkeys have no shame. The cheeky buggers'll stick their hands down your trouser pockets for anything in hopes of grabbing a peanut.

2) The Indians were really onto something with the whole Kama Sutra thing.

And lastly, the most important lesson I've learnt thus far on my Indian holiday:

1) Always drink bottled water. Always. Life or death, we're talking about here. But don't buy any from the kids on the street. And we thought You-Know-Who was a bloody menace.

Comments

[http://users.livejournal.com/_patil_padma/]

Poor Mikey, having to draw out his Firelog to complain about the cows. If he tried that here, he'd get a lot of- dirty looks, to say the least.


Though I don't recall the Kama Sutra playing a large part in our holiday thus far, Mr Corner.

[ms-pansy.livejournal.com]

Cows?

[http://users.livejournal.com/_lisa_turpin/]

Only a peanut? I'm suddenly feeling very sorry for Padma.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_morag/]

It sounds as though you fit in perfectly. Can we hope you'll be moving there permanently?

[charms-flitwick.livejournal.com]

Contact me upon your return, if you would. I have an idea I'd like to discuss with you.

I'm glad to read of your time in India. If you have time, you might visit The Sanchi stupa in Sanchi, Madhya Pradesh. There are several very accomplished wizards there working with some of the treasures they found, quite a few with interesting ancient Charms.